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Dec. 16th, 2010


Office Meta: 7.10 China, 7.11&7.12 Classy Christmas

Hey all,

It's been another couple of lean weeks and the two winners,falulatonks  and firthgal , wrote such great/amusing metas that I've included them in their entirety. Enjoy, and I hope to see more of you in the new year!

your friendly neighborhood mod.

 7.10 China

I was not motivatedd by compassion. I have no compassion. Make sure you got that. "Not motivated by compassion."Collapse )

7.11&7.12 Classy Christmas

Thank you, Scranton Strangler, I love you. You just took one more person's breath away.Collapse )

Dec. 1st, 2010


Office Meta: 7.07 Christening, 7.08 Viewing Party, 7.09 WUPHF.com

 Sorry for the unruly delay, again :/ Enjoy tomorrow's episode!

7.07 Christening 

What if the moon was your car and Jupiter was your hair brush?Collapse )
7.08 Viewing Party

Thirst. Now that’s a show I’d watch.Collapse )

7.09 WUPHF.com

*As firthgal  was the only person who I could find with a response, y'all are being treated to the whole entry of a poster who is always consistently awesome :)

I am on the first hot sale streak of my life. I think it all comes from feeding Cece, because no matter how much she resists, I sell her those carrots. Let's be honest--if I can make mushed carrots seem better than a boob... I can pretty much sell anythingCollapse )

Nov. 3rd, 2010


Office Meta 7.03, 7.04, 7.05, 7.06

 The best time to get caught up on metas? When NaNoWriMo is starting, of course! Sorry for the delay kids.

7.03 Andy's Play

He was getting a lot of applause and I just didn't think that it was indicative of how a lot of people were feeling.Collapse )
7.04 Sex Ed

Ohh. Ok. I didn't realize we were doing trick questions. What's the safest way to go skiing? Don't ski!Collapse )

7.05 The Sting

This morning, Danny Cordray stole a sale from me. So what do I do? I go out and I steal Danny Cordray. The sale that mattered, I made. Boom. Funny thing about it, we don't even need him. We already have Packer on the road. Chhguuh! Crap. I forgot about Packer.Collapse )

7.06 Costume Contest

Everyone realizes that this coupon book isn't actually worth fifteen thousand dollars, right? You'd have to spend two hundred thousand dollars on crap you don't actually need to get fifteen thousand dollars worth of benefits. I'm not the only one who sees this, right?Collapse )

Oct. 6th, 2010


Office Meta: 7.02 Counselling

Just so you know, I think you're all really really pretty and AMAAAAAZING. Also, I spell counselling with two "l"s because I'm Canadian. In case you were wondering. CONTINUING ON, here are some things that entertained me greatly, and make me the happiest man on earth. Girl. Woman. Person. Whatever. Have a great week! :)

 Psychiatrists tend to be more crazy than their patients. Therapists are whores. Psychiatry is a narcissism machine. I learn more from Dr. Seuss than Dr. Freud. Earth. You don't have to be crazy to live here, but it helps.Collapse )

Sep. 30th, 2010


Office Meta 7.01: Nepotism

Welcome back to the office land, everyone! I'm glad to see y'all back, meta-ing up a storm (word coining comes with the mod privileges). Just as a season opener reminder, if you would like to be quoted please put the keyword "office meta" in your interests, without the quotation marks--luckily with some voodoo I can still search interests on LJ. The day they take that away from me will be a sad one indeed. As well, if you plan to lock your meta/response/whatever posts, please, please, please friend scranton_reader  so I can access your entries. I sometimes run into people who have updated since the last episode, but I can't access their posts to check for meta, and let me tell you, the curiosity is killing me. Friending me will not do it; in order to keep my sanity I log into scranton_reader  to check for meta, so though you are of course welcome to friend me (uhh, what?), if you want your locked meta to show up in this public forum (again, uhh, what? Hadn't thought about that one) please friend scranton_reader . scranton_reader . Did I mention friending scranton_reader ? Right. TO THE META, AND BEYOND!

This summer, I did the minority executive training program at Yale. You guys, I'm, like, really smart now. You don't even know. You could ask me, "Kelly, what's the biggest company in the world?" And I'd be like, "blah blah blah, blah blah blah blah blah blah," giving you the exact right answer.Collapse )

Sep. 23rd, 2010


6.26: Whistleblower and GREATEST HITS

 Welcome back to Office seasons, meta-ing denizens of the world! I know I know. Anyways, because the season finale was (unfortunately, true to form) sadly lacking in the me compiling things department, I bring you a short recap (and I mean shooooooort! Cmon guys, I’ll take wittingly scathing criticism if that’s all you’ll give me! I mean, positive meta is fun, but whatever... it doesn’t have to be long, as few lines as you want! Or as many!). To demonstrate my neverending love and devotion to you all, I’ve also done a greatest hits, totally subjective of course, so to speak, of office metas. Because I have that power. By the way, the snap feature on Windows 7 is my new favourite thing in the world for making these things work.

Write your own damn novel.Collapse )

May. 20th, 2010


Office Meta 6.21-6.25

So this is awkward. Epic fail on my part, but enjoy the metas and the finale tonight.

Happy Hour: 6.21Collapse )

Secretary’s Day:6.22Collapse )

Body Language:6.23Collapse )

The Cover Up:6.24Collapse )

The Chump:6.25Collapse )

Mar. 24th, 2010


Office Meta 6.20: New Leads

Welcome to another instalment of Office Meta, for the episode New Leads. I’m just going to leave this here and let y’all do what you wish. Have a great Thursday!

Honey, if I don't have time to answer an e-mail, I definitely don't have time to walk over to your desk.Collapse )

Mar. 17th, 2010


Office Meta: 6.17-18 The Delivery & 6.19 St. Patrick`s Day

My apologies all, for my impudence in not posting last week’s meta on time. IT WAS AN IMPORTANT EPISODE, CARLY, GEEZ WAY TO DROP THE BALL. I know. But here it is! And it is awesome. Also present in this post: meta for St. Patrick’s Day. ON ST PATRICK’S DAY. Isn’t that cute? I think it’s cute. I’ll try to get the rest of these in on time (and, uh, do the ones I missed last year. Oops? I said I’d do those at, what, Christmas?) even if I have to whip out my laptop at tech rehearsals. Even if I have to edit in between my scenes at the performance of my musical in two weeks. OK maybe not. It’s a musical: I like to sing along.

Did you know that labour can last weeks? Then they take your insides out and they just plop them on a table, and sometimes epidurals don't work, and you can poop yourself.Collapse )

St Patrick`s Day is the closest the Irish have to ChristmasCollapse )

Feb. 18th, 2010


Office Meta 6.16: Manager & Salesman

A haiku comment
Is easiest late at night.
P.S.: Hey there, bias!

I am treating you the same as a man, for whom I would also not stand. Unless it was the President. Or Judge JudyCollapse )

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December 2010



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